c h r i s t m a s

Christmas it's practically here! First and foremost, I Jessica am probably thee worst blogger, journal keeper, note taker, whatever you want to call it in the history of the world. I wanted to post about Thanksgiving, school activities, family outings, etc. The Holidays are always so busy for me each year. However, right now as I am writing this post...this time is my favorite time.  I'm alone with my scriptures, pictures from the year, belly full, new pj's, and well snuggled up in my bed thinking.

Thinking about what? Well it's more like what am I not thinking about. Hopefully this post will be semi organized and can semi make sense. If not, oh well typical jess for you, I've never been like the writing English person. Also, heads up thanks to Cass instead of xmas...I'm using her trend as "cmas". Don't hate :)

Once November hits, let me tell you--family traditions right and left! I love the Holiday season. It is crazy and stressful, but yes it is the most wonderful time of the year. Some of the highlights from these past two months is as follows:

• Cutting down Christmas tree (i'm not about hiking in the mountain to have my mom decide she like the very first one she saw, but hey being away in the mountains and breaking out the Christmas tunes is what I enjoy)
• Pumpkin Cookies! (not a huge fan of pumpkin pie, but I'll eat pumpkin cookies till I have a food baby)
• Ending of Football start of Basketball (haha yes I love football way to much--we know that--I just love the final last crisp cold game of the season. Basketball never has been way exciting in my life...till high school--but really not till I became an Aggie and experienced the Spectrum Magic)
• Thanksgiving Feast (yes we have shrimp and crab cocktail, and yes it is the best around. I also love going around the room and hearing what everybody is thankful for. Oh can't forget about me getting a food baby then either, then going into a food coma--its pretty solid if you ask me)
• Black Friday Shopping (I JESSICA HATE SHOPPING. However, bless my mom's heart I went with her to pick me out a pair of boots. I mean in all reality if anyone is in need for some classic entertainment--I highly recommend sitting outside of VS, in Target, or any electronic place)
• Progressive Dinner (my dad's side of the family, goes to each house for a different course of the meal and I guess to see everybody's cmas decorations? However, I just love being with the family)
• Temple Square (it's just not the holidays unless you have that cliche temple pick am I right?)
• Piano Guys (for the past two years as a family we have gone to their concert. I love concerts and have been to many--however the three hour concert they put on is spectacular!) 
• Grade Dinner (it used to be every quarter if we got good grades my parents would take us out to dinner, but being college students it's after the semester. Which is probably a good time, since I'm out of food anyways. Tepanyaki steak house treated our stomachs very well that evening)
• Work Party (my boss is the greatest, my coworker is the greatest and a girl night out is just what we needed)
• Baking (we have pumpkin, chocolate chip, Reese's peanut butter cup cookies, Oreo truffles, chocolate cinnamon bears, chocolate and caramel pretzels, homemade caramel and fudge---lets just say I think for at least the next week or so I will have a permanent food baby)
• Christmas Movies (can i quote the whole thing of Grinch, yes I can and it's "FABULOUS". But really Polar Express, Santa Clause, Christmas Vacation, Home Alone, Elf, the list goes on and never gets old)

As you can see the past two months have been one for the record books and hopefully I get time to post about them...however, I am missing out on the biggest thing. The reason for the season. The LDS church this year starting a campaign/hashtag event (i don't really know what to call it), but it was all about Share the Gift--if you haven't seen it click HERE. This got me thinking of how I can share the gift not only for this Christmas season, but all year along. What can I do? Which then led me on to the question---if I had to give a gift to the Savior that I would give to him on Christmas morning, what would it be? I have pondered that question a lot and here are my thoughts and I guess my testimony along with it. 

I thought about like what material things Christ might want..like maybe a new robe, or the newest electronic. I know it is pointless to think about that because he doesn't need any of that to make him happy. So that led me to, well what would make me happy this Christmas season as a gift. I thought about a new pair of boots, family time, etc. When it came down to it...the thing that would make me happiest of all, is if Christ knew that I loved him. He is the best gift I will ever receive and ever have received. (not to say my horse I got one year is still like close number one) But without Christ there would be no season. So I studied in the scriptures, prayed, and pondered on my gift to him.

Like I said above, I want Christ to know I love him. Truly love him. As we have been taught all he wants and asks from us is a broken heart and contrite spirit, to come unto him like a child. Submissive, meek, and humble etc. I want him to know that I am thankful for his atoning sacrifice, for the perfect example and life he lived, for his understanding and patience that he has with me. Lastly, I want him to know how thankful I am for him to be my brother and how excited I am to hopefully one day be in his presence and embrace. Jesus is the Christ. He is the reason we as a human race will wake in the morning and open as fast as we can the wrapped packages; he was the first gift. He is the reason why there is hope, peace, joy, and good will to all men. He is the reason for the season.

So going back to my comment about "my favorite time in the holiday's is Christmas Eve when I'm all snuggled in bed, by myself." Is because I get to remind myself of the greatest gift I have been given- Jesus Christ-- and because of him (as I look through pictures from the past year) I have been given so much. As the clock ticks and we all wake from our sleep (those who sleep that is) and rush into the Christmas spirit, I pray and hope we can remember why we celebrate Christmas. No gift will ever be greater then the gift the world received, when Jesus was born. I hope not only I can always remember that, but whoever has stuck with the post and has read to the end can as well. 

Merry Christmas to all and to all a goodnight!

The annual cmas tree picture with the sibilings

PS: if anybody is wondering this song is playing over and over in my head.

Brick Walls

I like to think I am patient...but in reality I am probably the least patient person when it comes to certain things. I like to think I can make a decision, but once again I probably am one of the most indecisive people I know. Yet, when I do make a decision there is about zero percent chance that anybody or anything can change it, stubborn I mean I'd say so. haha Needless to say, this week I literally hit a brick wall that told me I need to learn humility. Then I also hit the brick wall that said; figure out next semester classes, what career to do, how am I going to pay for anything, and then holy crap holidays are around the corner!

More than anything I hit my brick wall of fear, then I came along this talk. There were literally three fears I had-->"Fear of the future, fear of failure, fear of not knowing what they can become. In the gospel of Jesus Christ, fear is the opposite of faith. If you have fear faith diminishes, but if you have faith, fear diminishes." Goodness I needed this talk. I am moving forward with taking classes that interest me even if I'm not sure that is what I want to do. I am moving forward with faith and grasping more on to my Savior. I am not perfect and it is going to be really hard to move forward...but I have to because blessings are waiting for me.

There is still my brick wall of patience that I need to overcome. Little sis knew exactly what I needed and she sent me this...and I just love her.

My Princess...

WAIT ON ME

Wait on Me, My princess. My timing is always perfect. I know you're anxious about many things, and I see your passion for all the plans I have put in your heart. I know that you long to fly, and I see your enthusiasm. However, just as a vine-dresser nurtures the vine and waits patiently for the right moment to harvest the grapes, so too am I working tirelessly to prepare you to bear much fruit. Don't run ahead of me or try to fly before my plans are complete. Your strength will fail you, and your dreams will wither away. Trust me that my dreams for you are far greater than you can dream on your own. You will run farther and soar higher if you will patiently wait for the season of my blessing. Draw close to me now, and I promise that this season of waiting will bring you the sweetest of rewards.

Love,

Your King and Lord of perfect timings

Sorry for the vent sesh...#thisismyjournal. I know that I can do hard things, I know that all will be well. I know that if I humble my self and ask for help from my Father in Heaven; that I will have patience, that I will be strong, and that in the end all will make sense.

On a brighter note: Cheers to family night tomorrow as well, it is very much so needed! H E L L O November which means---->Traditions, family, goodies, fire places, hot cocco, snow, and season of thankfulness, giving, and love! I can't wait for the memories.

..should be studying..

ask me if I should be studying--yes. ask me if i should do something more productive--probably. ask me if I miss Kaycee Shae and just really wanna talk to her, but instead I vent on a blog because she is a missionary and so here I am writing this novel for those who want to read it. enjoy... :)

I will still do this day remember when Maisie text me and told me the names of our roommates. Being the creeper that I am, stalking was in full force. Little did I know how much these girls would mean to me. Over the summer I wanted so badly to hear Brooke sing. Guys hook up with her. I could listen to her all day and most of the time I like her version of a song better than the actual song. I love the nights where us three just sit in someones room or in the family room and pin. Brittany and I pin game is unreal..follow us :) Brooke just sings and plays. If I were to die first ever she is singing at my funeral. Brittany...she pushes me. She honestly is so dedicated. I never see her not studying. She is not a nerd or she is not anti-social. She just knows what she wants and will work as hard she can to get it. When I come home from work 90% of the time I don't want to do anything. Yet lately I have been coming home and studying because if Britt can--I can! I mean plus the fact that she is secretly this designer I mean check out here blog HERE you should see her room as well...that's possibly too creepy though. haha Both of these sisters though really have just been there for me. They have listened to my vent sessions and tried to help me read minds lately. 

Cassie Lou: This human basically deserves a whole post to herself. One day she will...I just am lazy right now. (sorry cass you know I still love her). I mean if you wanna follow her go HERE. I love her. Even though she is three months older then me and I am three feet taller she's my sister. Ask us how many times we have talked these past two weeks and we will tell you every day, multiple times a day. I also have to publicly thank her for being my wing women two weekends ago. ;) The best part is she is family and so she is stuck with me for eternity! She understands me and sometimes even better than I understand my self. I love her and I need another weekend where we stay up way to late and drink way to much Dr. Pepper. 

These humans make me really happy. The fact that I met them last year and instantly become best of friends was by no chance. It amazes me how we can go forever without seeing each other or talking, but once we get back together it is like we never left. I am so thankful for the many laughs and vent seshs that they put up with me. Goodness and aren't they just a good looking group as well. **shout out to grego, al, christian, jew, jo and syd! You guys are the greatest and I love you all.**

Basically, I love football. I love this stadium. I love the hurd. I love football pants. I love manly men. Honestly, I just am really proud to be an Aggie and am enjoying the game under the lights on the field to its fullest. There is nothing then I love more than play makin happening for the offense and the defense doing work. I do hate people who just yell the 'f word' the whole time. Honestly, grow up and just support the team and don't be drunk. Please and thank you.

Sophomore Year

Hello Utah State.. We meet again.

I have to give a quick shout out to Kell and Abs. I mean I know I said that I was moving up to college with out my best friend and I wasn't sure how I was going to do it. However, those two just really don't know how much they mean to me and how lucky I am to have them as friends. This year with them has already been one for the books to remember and it's only the second week. Sierrah just fits right in as well!

It is really weird that Kayc isn't in my room this year. But here is my room. I have a slight obsession with pictures. Someone asked me why I loved pictures after looking at the picture wall. Well my answer to that is because I can look at a picture and thousands of memories come flooding back, emotions, conversations, and It helps me not forget. Basically if you are on this wall I love you and if you aren't and want to be on the wall you just have to take a picture with me. If you don't want to take a picture I guess I'll still love you.. :) Simple as that. I do like having my own bathroom as well. Plus my favorite part of my room...my canvas my parents gave me of the Savior. It feels like home.

Roommates: Bwinny and Bwooke and KIM are well let me just say Heaven sent as well. They are the most caring, hardworking, in shape, dedicated, nicest, Betty Crockers, that I really could ask for. The Lord knew that I need them and I honestly couldn't be more thankful. :) They put up with me and push me when I need it. Plus listen my the craziness of my life.

 

First week of school...Lets just say blessed are the professors that don't make anything due. Because in reality you know that week of welcome is where you need to be. High Stakes Bingo, movie on the Quad, Day on the Quad, free concert, watch parties for the games, free shirts, food, and to top off a 80's dance. I mean was I so close to winning a TV/fridge in bingo, yes and it's still a sore subject. Football...you already know that I will be on the second row for tomorrow's game and I can hardly wait. :) Dancing the night away with good company was the perfect touch to top it off. The last picture is one of my favorites of us girls..pretty sure we could totally have pulled of being in the 80's. I do not like dances though for the fact of everybody's sweat. haha Non the less, I'll continue to bust a move whenever I can. :)

I have survived the first two weeks of school. I have ish loads of homework to do. But I mean I much rather stay up till 1:00 or 3:00 in the morning talking instead. Even though I feel like a zombie the next day. haha I just have a weakness for charming men, but what girl doesn't right? :). Logan is starting to feel like my home away from home again. Now off to class..pray I don't doze off and will find some time for homework. **peace**

USU round 2

get ready for the overload of pictures :)

I should be packing and getting ready to move up for school. As excited I am to to be an Aggie again, I'm slightly not excited. You see last year was the hardest, most challenging, most life learning, most rewarding, exciting, adventurous, it was just everything. I think what made it so much was the people I was in contact with, my roomies, and my best friend. Did you enjoy the pictures above? Yes, Kaycee loves to take pictures and we sorta love to think that we are professionals or something and take pictures..so **peace**. We took these pictures on the last weekend we were in Hooper. Then three days later we were roomies. People are always amazed that we stay friends because we did room together...I mean in all honesty...we just get each other. There were times when I wanted to smash her alarm clock (it would ring for like 4 hours, she sleeps like she is in a coma haha), and there were times she wanted to rip my head off. But more than anything I think why part of me is dreading going back up to school...is because I'm going to miss those late night talks..just us two. I'm going to miss sleeping on her (memory foam) bed and her snuggling with me on mine. I'm going to miss hiding chocolate and exchanging homework. --we did not cheat just helped each other--. I'm going to miss her closet, her cooking skills, her guitar and singing skills, but you know it is all well. In her email to me yesterday...she told me that it would be. Plus she wanted me to live it up for her. "Because you don't remember the nights you got plenty of sleep"--her motto-- I mean and TSwifts new song/album coming out made me excited! As TSwift's new Shake It Off song is on repeat and everything is starting to be packed up I really am excited. Adventure is waiting for me in Cache Valley and I'm headed for it!

Some of my favorite pictures from my freshman year...enjoy :)

 

PS: I am so ready for football its unreal....ah! that post will be soon...

b e [UTAH] f u l

You know can I just say I L O V E where I live. I love traveling and I think it would be fun to live some where maybe different when I'm first married etc. or whatever. No matter what though, I really couldn't live anywhere else, but Utah. I honestly love how I can be in the country and small town of Hooper to then go up to Wasatch Park and see endless trees on a mountain range. Honestly, I feel like pictures never do justice. Plus, Sunday drives with dad is always a good thing.

My family and I decided to get away for the weekend. I just wish it could be longer. We did the annual Park City back to school shopping, but I guess once you are in college you are happy for towels and kitchen supplies. haha Oh well I really am grateful I was just able to "relax". Lately, my life has been a whirlwind. I feel like I'm going a hundred miles and hour when all I really want to do is cry. ha I am supposed to move up this week back to Logan for school...um don't ask, but I haven't even started packing. I just barely got my books, don't know where my classes are, but hey it's whatever right? My best friend has been out a whole month...goodness...17 more months might just kill me. I really just wish I could have a phone call...at least tomorrow is PDay. I just have never been 'alone' in the sense of I've always had Kayc by my side for the 'big' and 'small' stuff. (yes i have family. yes i have friends. it's not the same, and i wish i could somehow make it the same) This new adventure I am about to embark on this week...well I'm diving in head first and going to make the most of it...or at least that is what I keep telling myself.

Stars: simply one of my favorite things. I wish this picture was my claim to fame, but in all reality the way stars look to me know one will ever be able to capture it. My favorite place to watch and look at stars...1: Island Park. 2: Lake Powell. 3: My backyard. Every girl loves stars...ya ya whatever. I mean I saw 12 shooting stars over the course of 2 nights..so cheers to me. The paragraph above sounds like I'm depressed haha or something. (not deleting it because well *peace*). I honestly can stay up for hours just watching stars forever. My cousin Ty used to watch stars with me when I was little. My dad and I are usually always the last one by the fire when everybody else turns in. Most words are said in silence and the most heart felt conversations are said as well. When all said and done that simple 30 min where my mom, dad, sis, and I just watched and sat in silence is exactly what I needed. I can get through this week and the next...even if I become a zombie in the process...because I can't wait to see what the Lord has in store for me.

missionaries

"two years is a long time for me....to be here without you it's hard to believe. But I know its the right thing, and I'll miss you dearly"<-- This song simply explains exactly how it was for me to see my friends head off to serve the Lord. (Carli just needs to make a song now for 18 months).

I will never forget as President Monson got up in General Conference and announced the age change for the missionary program. Two of my guy friends were watching film after a Friday night game. I texted them and they didn't believe it till they got home and heard for themselves. I always had planned and knew that my guy friends would go on missions, but I felt like we would go to college first and have a year just like future generations before us. That was not the Lord's plan. Mission call openings started to happen. It was crazy! Every Wednesday and sometimes even Thursday starting around December I would be at one of my friends house as they opened their precious white envelope and announce where they would be headed! In my seminary building we had a "who went to Fremont and now serving a mission wall" and then due to the age change we started "who has their call wall". The "call wall" was filling up fast it. It was so exciting. I had 4 guy friends that were honestly some of my best friends. Once the age change, something clicked in them. They started to mature and well simply be the boys that I knew they would be. They have been officially now out a year!! To think that next summer I'll have them home makes me excited. Yes, they and I have grown up and we are on our own paths now but I feel as though we still have some memories to make with each other. Saying goodbye to these 4 were some of the hardest goodbyes I had. I am so proud of them though! I love reading their emails and letters. Hearing about their experiences and seeing the spiritual growth inside of them inspires me to draw closer to the Savior and gain a stronger testimony. I love them and they will always be my boys!

The age change wasn't just for boys, but for girls as well. I thought saying goodbye to my guy friends was hard...little did I know that saying "see you soon" to my girls would be a lot harder. I was blessed my first year in college, so extremely blessed. My apartment well we were perfect, PV 24 for life. The next door over PV 23 well lets just say they were perfect as well. The Lord knew that I would become best of friends with those girls. Over the course of the school year I watched four girls, two of which I lived with, but four girls whose testimonies changed my life. One is my best friend and I love her. Another one is Maisie Ellen, this woman gets me. She has the biggest heart as well. She always knew just what and when to say things, plus is my partner when we are "crazy" (crazy maisie and crazy jess haha) Kira, she may be small but she has a huge testimony. I'll never forget the late night talks about life and her Relief Society lessons she gave. Aubree Ann, I don't think I have ever been with her and not laughed or smiled. She honestly always made my day better. These now sister missionaries (Aub leaves next Wednesday!) are blessing the lives of people in France, Mexico, Argentina, and Virginia. Yet they still take care of me. Not being able to come home to your best friends and tell the about life, is really hard. Letters and emails me the world to me. So what if I cry at work in my little cubical right? 

Yesterday being a Monday and all meant--PDAY! Goodness, I honestly never use my phone any more, except Monday. I had emails flowing in from 9:00-1:00 of emails from everybody. I have a lot of other friends on missions (I just don't have pictures) but I get their emails as well. All of them are so.. h a p p y. They are serving with all they have. 

"two years is a time for me (or 18 months), to give back for each breath that i breathe. i know its a small thing compared to eternity.." I love my missionaries. I love this gospel. I love Mondays (only for the fact of these cuties emails though) I love the Lord and I know that he loves me.